I've decided to adopt a slogan for my life. In keeping with the post I recently wrote on Forgiveness, I really have some gained some new liberty, and it's primarily because I have maintained a constant thought: Let it go. It has worked on a couple of occasions since last weekend in situations where I normally ended up in a "tizzy". I told myself to just let it go.
And so this is my new slogan; my ever-present thought. Let it go.
Today my kids' Sunday School teacher had a chat with me about my kids' behaviour. Not just Hannah's. Not just Seth's. Both. Being typically easygoing and quite lenient, I knew how bad it must be for her to talk to me about it. She said they were "the worst kids in the class" and have been for about the last four weeks, and were particularly bad today. By "worst kids" she meant that they didn't listen. They just ignored her. They did what they wanted.
Now, the old me would come home, ponder and stew, and then berate myself incessantly for my failure as a mother. But I'm determined that's not going to happen. After discussing this with the kids in the car on the way home from church, hubby and I decided some changes needed to be made mostly at home and mostly by me. I fully confess that I've been far too lenient and not consistent enough. Obviously. I mean kids don't just act that way without it being trained into them. I've been too much into the "ignoring the bad behaviour" because I've simply been worn out and have put off dealing with it. This is something I know all honest mothers can relate to. We've also decided that Sunday School next week is not an option and they will spend it with mom and dad. Sunday School is, after all, a privilege, not a right. Then we'll go from there and see if they're improving.
And the new me is just going to let it go. I absolutely refuse to beat myself up over it. I'm just going to work on changing it.
Hubby decided tonight to postpone the rest of our renovations until after June 15. That means I have half of my cranberry walls painted and half of my bronze walls painted. That means that I have a mess. That means that my house looks stupid and no one is allowed here until the fall. (Just kidding).
I can't blame his reasoning at all. He took this week off to originally lay laminate. Then I added to it by painting, taking much of his time away laying laminate. He still has a little bit of finishing work to do with the flooring, which he'll complete in the next few days. The problem comes in because he doesn't want me to paint any more until all of the baseboards and crown moulding are completed, because trying to silicone on the newly painted wall creates more work for him, makes it more messy, causing more "touch up" work in the end. He can't finish the baseboards until after June 15 because he's got to get the taxes done by that deadline, and he's got a truck falling apart (I guess brake pads touching metal warrants falling apart, right?) which really isn't even safe to drive right now.
The old me wants to cry. And resist.
The new me is going to let it go.
I am resolved.